I have been thinking a lot about grief and how it effects us all. As an artist I have the need to express myself through photos. I am attempting to make something to speak to the process of grieving.
Grief feels like this to me. When the world starts to unravel around us, when it seems surreal that everything keeps going on despite our pain, as if everything is normal, when it seems that nothing will ever be the same for us again. We experience grief at different times and for different reasons, but that initial shock is universal.
This is the 1st in a series of 3 images. The other images are yet to be created, but are on their way
This was a fairly involved portrait to create with a many meetings/phone conversations/and text messaging to talk about the concept and feeling that we wanted to create and capture. We created this cover shot of Theresa in what is the oldest working court room in the United States. Below are some iPhone photos I took for reference in advance of the portrait as well as set up photos in process of creating the portrait.
I wanted to have a very dark portrait but the room was filled with light so I set my camera to way underexpose the photo and added light to that dark exposure using my flashes. The photo was shot with an 85mm lens ISO 100 shutter 1/200 Aperture 5.6 The main light on her face up and camera left I wanted to be kind of harsh and I wanted the light to be only on her not the back ground, so I put a spot grid on it. I didn’t want the shadows to be too dark though so I put a ring flash on my camera at a very low setting this just nudges the shadows up a little but doesn’t get rid of them all together. And the 3rd light I added was shot through a soft box with a strip modifier on it I used this modifier because I wanted the light coming from behind her to be soft and just kiss her cheek and hair.
Here is the final portrait